I'm not sure why I am making this post. Maybe I'm hoping that I'm not the only one out there that has ever felt this way and that I'm really not that crazy. Lately I have been feeling that I'm not good enough. I'm not a good enough mom, not a good enough wife, sister, neighbor... My kids deserve so much more from me. Dust deserves so much more... I look at my life and all the blessings that I have. A wonderful husband that loves to care and serve his family. Three wonderful kids that are healthy, smart and fun to be around. Parents that have been ultimate examples of giving Christ like love and service. Brothers and Sisters that are always there for me, no matter what. I have so many things that I am thankful for and blessed with. I should do more. I should be better. Why do I feel like I don't deserve the things I have been blessed with? How do I overcome this? I want to be better. I want to be the wife, mother, sister... that I dream about being. Has anyone else ever felt like this? Or is it just me?
Home MTC
2 years ago
4 comments:
I feel this way every single day of my life. I feel like I'm a pretty good wife, but the mom thing...that's another story!
I guess it's better that we feel like we should do more than feeling like we do enough. Why would we want to do better if we thought we were already the best we could be, you know? But, then there is a point where we need to realize that even though we could do better, if we do the best we can, that's good enough!
You are not the only one that feels this way. I have had these days and I know other mom's that have felt the same way.
Sometimes I have those days and sometimes I have those weeks. I felt that way for awhile after I had my last baby. I thought it was baby blues but I'm not sure if that's what it was. I just couldn't make myself be happy and I didn't feel like I was being a good wife or mother. It was really hard to snap out of. What finally helped was pouring my heart out to my husband and to the Lord. I prayed really hard and cryed really hard and it helped.
Since then it has been better but I still have those days every now and then. Remember, not everyone can be happy every day.
But here are some things that have helped me. I realized that when I have a down day and I just sulk in it and feel not good enough, then it just makes it worse. But if I get up and do the things I know I should do: Clean the house, spend quality time with each of my kids, sing Primary songs with them, and teach them a lesson from the nursery manual (those are things on my list), if I do those things then at the end of the day I will feel good about the day, like I've been productive and I've been a good wife and mother. It's so hard to do those things some days but when I actually do, then I feel really good and productive and overall I have a better spirit about me b/c I feel like I've done what I wanted to do that day, and then it makes the next day easier, and the next day, and the next.
Also, I've learned that if I say my prayers and read my scriptures in the morning that really helps my day go better. I used to be really bad about morning prayers b/c my kids would wake me up in the morning and be demanding so I'd just get up and go. And I'd read my scriptures at night. But I'm finding now that if I just wake up 30 min. before they do and say my prayer and ask for the spirit and the Lord's help, and ask for him to help me be a good mom, that with the combination of reading scriputes helps my day go so much better!
I hope this helps. Just know that there are many others that know what you are going through, it's normal- and you can get through it. We're here for you. And also- I think you are a great mom. I know we don't hang out much, but I've seen your posts and I can tell your kids are happy kids and that means that you are a good mom. I know your husband and kids love you even if you don't always have good days.
monica you should read sheri dews book saying it like it is i shall bring it in for duston to tkae home to you that has helped me so much with my feelings of that whole thing minus the mommy thing cause i'm not one yet. but Monica you are a GREAT mother and sister and wife! You are sooo good with children!! and so fun to be around! I LOVE YOU TONS!
Hey Monica thanks for the comment on my blog. I'm sorry about Dustin's wallet. I'm really hoping that they just took the cash and chucked my purse in the trash somewhere. Thanks for subing in primary on Sunday! When I saw you in there it made my day!!!
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